The Nuthouse

Date night

2011-12-23T18:03:00.001-06:00

For the second time in several years, I'm going out on a date with my husband. I'm giddy with excitement! My hair's fixed, my makeup is on, and I'm gettin' gussied up in soft, feminine clothes. See ya later!

2011-11-09T14:10:00.002-06:00

Lord, I'm ready for my upgrade. My software is outdated. I need, and receive, continual patches from you, but I think I may need a reinstall. I'm open to receive the life, the personhood, the personality, and the GOODNESS you wish for my life. Please, help me to meet the challenges in my life with goodness and grace, to show Your love and mercy in all my actions and words. Praise be Your most Holy Name. Amen.

In other news

2011-10-06T09:34:00.002-05:00

Shorty HATES school now. He says he has all the workload and none of the benefits of regular public school, and he just wants to go already. I'm not sure what the right thing is anymore.

His grades are suffering due to his...apathy? anger? I'm not sure exactly what it is. Sometimes he just doesn't seem to care, but at others he seems so discouraged. His behavior, while somewhat better, still needs a lot of work before I'd be comfortable sending him to school every day.

On the one hand, he usually acts better for other people than for me (typical, I know), but on the other, once he's comfortable (which wouldn't, for him, take long) he'd be acting the same there as here. And that would be a BIG problem, both for the teachers and administration there, and for him, specifically.

One of my biggest fears in sending him is that his...well, his lack of maturity, his complete inability to read how annoyed people get with his behavior, his...insistence that even people who don't really like him are his best friends, will get him into fights and other bad situations.

His heart is so sensitive; I just don't want it broken. It's so hard to be a mom sometimes.

Only in a house with a pre-independent potty user...

2011-10-06T09:27:00.002-05:00

"Mama, I gotta go poo-poo," he says quietly, as he stretches to reach the doorknob to the bathroom.
"Okay. Make sure you call me when you're done so I can wipe your butt."
"Okay." A little bit later, "Mama! I'm done! Come wipe my butt now!"

I'll be SO glad when this final phase of potty training is behind us. < snickering quietly > Behind. Ha!

CRAZY!

2011-09-10T08:42:00.002-05:00

The older two kids have been telling me for a while now that they want to go back to public school. Okay, I'll admit, not my favorite idea, but they're both teenagers and I get it. I also know, though, that what I'd been doing hasn't worked for our family in quite some time.

So*, I made a deal with them. If they got their math caught up over this last summer, I'd enroll them in the local public school this fall. If not, I'd enroll them in K12 this fall, and whenever they catch up they can go to public school then.

Needless to say, my lazy children did NOT do even a month's worth of math all summer, and so they've started K12.

The Princess started 8th grade 3 weeks ago, and yes, I had them change only her math to a lower grade. The first week and a half or so were really rough, on both of us. Learning the new system, setting up a plan, negotiating new waters...it all took its toll and we both wound up in tears a couple of times. But, we persisted, and she's now flying through her lessons, doing well in everything, and bragging to her friends at church about how she can have school at any hour she wants and can do her work in her pajamas! :D

Shorty just started 9th grade this week, though, and it's been more of a struggle for him. I knew (sort of, as high school is WAY different than 8th grade) what to expect, though, and at least I'm not panicking this time. I know he's supposed to be more independent now, but he still has his challenges, which is why we're home learners in the first place. So*, I did a lot of the planning stuff for him. I set up a schedule for him to get caught up on the 2 weeks of school he's behind on (not his fault, but he's having to fix it, completely unfair, but what can you do...). He only has to do a double workload for 2 weeks and it'll all be okay. Poor kid.

And, in the meantime, Wednesday night church dinner and classes started back up this week (YAY!), Shorty's behavior has, well, sucked lately, Boo has decided he doesn't want to be called Boo anymore but can't decide on a new nickname, Moose keeps wetting the bed, and The Daddy is working more than 60 hours a week to make it possible for me to continue to stay home and teach our kids.

Calgon, take me away!

tools

2011-07-26T17:01:00.002-05:00

Met with Shorty's case manager and doctor today. The doctor changed his meds...we shall see if this has any effect.

The case manager gave us some tools, that Shorty has agreed to. If he hurts (with hands, objects, or mouth) anyone, or takes anything he doesn't own, he must do 30 minutes of Marine Corp workout. If he refuses, he loses the use of his hands for 2 hours.

This isn't just punishment. It's also a way to get more physical activity out of him, which should help lower his aggression and stress levels. Also, he wants to be a Marine someday, and this will help him physically prepare, and give him some coping skills so he can get back off the meds someday.

I'm hopeful.

and then he changed his mind...

2011-05-30T02:55:00.002-05:00

I thought he hated me. how else could he have said the things he said, asked for a divorce, let go of all of us, said it wasn't worth it...

Is he saying he still loves me just so I'll come back? Is it just for the kids? Has anything really changed?

Sigh. Complicated.

Divorce

2011-03-03T14:38:00.002-06:00

I changed the description of my blog today. The Daddy and I are going to get a divorce.

This makes me sad for a number of reasons. To be honest, though, it's also a relief of sorts. I feel like it's not the end of the world but a new beginning instead.

It's taken me a long time to feel this way, and sometimes my feelings are still conflicted.

The paperwork I need was not available at the courthouse, and the local attorney wants $750 to draw up the papers, plus $200 to file them. Blech. I'll find them online. The Daddy and I will fill them out together and I'll file them myself.

Most of the time, I feel like a single parent.

2010-10-24T15:17:00.002-05:00

I shouldn't have to argue with him about whether or not he should help me with the children. I can't be in two (or more) places at once, and I shouldn't be made to feel bad about asking him to do one of the three things that need to be done at once.

It's not my fault that he committed to someone else after I'd already told him I needed help. We should come first in his considerations, and we shouldn't have to fight for that place.

He goes to work every day and pays the bills. I'm grateful for that, don't get me wrong. I just think he could be a lot more helpful than he is. And he could at least be willing. Would it really be that hard?

Conflicting feelings

2010-05-14T13:07:00.002-05:00

i'm just so upset right now. how could he choose this over all of us. i want to talk to him, to see him and tell him how much he's hurt us, how disappointed we are, how angry...how it's not our fault it's hi. but he's so sad and hurt and i don't want him to try to make me feel guilty and it would just make me angrier. he says he guesses he's on his own and I guess he's right because i will not help him with his trial. I will not bail him out. i love him so much but he's robbed us all of the guy he used to be and we'll never ever get him back and i won't ever be able to think of him the same way again. i thought e was one of the smartest men i know but this is all just so very stupid i just don't understand and i don't think i ever will...

To: The most wonderful mom i know; from: The Princess

2010-05-09T17:11:00.002-05:00

Dear Mom,
I Love You.
Happy Mother's Day!
Your the most wonderful Mom in the world. i dont' know what i would have done without you!
Thank you for cooking me Dinner, taking care of me when im sick, being nice, taking me everywhere i need to go, signing me up for swim team, and most importantly, being my mom.
from your loving kid, Princess

That's what was written in the card she gave me this morning before I got out of bed. :)

Our new schedule is even crazier than I thought!

2010-04-21T12:06:00.004-05:00

The Princess has swim team practice and Girl Scouts on Mondays.
Princess's swim team practice on Tuesdays. 4-H for the 3 oldest kids once a month. Homeschool support group for Mom once a month.
Shopping, library, appointments, swimming for all the kids, and car maintenance on Wednesdays. Sometimes we'll skip most of this in favor of a field trip.
More swim team practice for The Princess on Thursdays.
The older kids have taken to swimming before roller skating on Friday evenings.
Saturdays we *have* to do yard work and gardening or it won't get done. If they start early enough and work hard enough, they get it done in time to go swimming.
Shorty has Boy Scouts on Sundays, and the kids really want to go back to church.

They like to swim, can you tell?

And every day they have to do schoolwork, Scout work, 4-H projects, or something. We don't have time anymore for them to take days off like they used to. They have to read in the van and do their table work every day before we leave.

Once a month Shorty also has a Boy Scout campout which lasts from Friday evening through Sunday afternoon. He's been wanting me to go with him, and I did this last weekend. I'm still tired from it.

So now I'm going somewhere every. single. day. Except when I'm camping. Then I'm just away for 2 1/2 days. And the rest of the weekend plans fall apart. No one else goes anywhere or does anything, except water the garden if it needs it.

This will last until...well, I guess whenever swim meets start, and then our weekends will be even worse.

And now the boys want to play soccer.

How exactly would all this work if I were working full time, or even part time? The Daddy would not be willing to run them around like this, so they'd have to drop back down to only Scouts and nothing else unless I did it and worked nights or something.

Giveaway!

2010-04-09T13:33:00.002-05:00

Peace Creek on the Prairie is giving away one free registration to the Schoolhouse Expo. I want it BADLY!

I'm afraid we're about to get VERY busy again.

2010-04-08T23:49:00.002-05:00

The Princess and Shorty have one or two more swimming lessons left in their 6 lesson block. Shorty understands the strokes necessary and just needs to work on endurance to be able to pass his swim test for Boy Scouts. The Princess, however...

The coaches called her "a machine. She's like the Energizer bunny!" as we watched her practice some more after the last lesson. They say she should be on a swim team. She's amazing.

What's more, she loves it. Truly loves swimming, loves racing, loves learning how to move faster, more efficiently, smoother. She wants to be on a team, to practice more, to excel.

So now I'm researching swimming teams in the Tulsa area, looking for meets we can go watch, and taking her to the pool as often as I can.

And, she needs a swim cap. And a racing suit.

We're also going to our first 4H meeting this coming Tuesday.

For those keeping track, that's Girl Scouts on Mondays, 4H on Tuesdays, swimming and shopping and appointments on Wednesdays, and Boy Scouts on Sundays, along with as many additional swimming sessions as possible. Plus, there's a Monday morning club I'd like to join myself if I can ever drag my lazy butt out of bed early enough to actually go.

And we "do school" every day except Wednesday and Sunday, as well.

I'm tired even thinking about it all. Wake me when it's over, k?

Homeschooling in Oklahoma

2010-04-05T19:55:00.002-05:00

I've been asked by a few local people lately about homeschooling, and have decided to copy/paste an email I wrote and add some more information here, so I'll be able to link to this post later instead of retyping it all. I also hope it helps anyone considering homeschooling here in the Tulsa area, or anywhere else. :)

The laws in Oklahoma are very good on the side on homeschooling. Our state constitution specifically protects the rights of parents to direct the education of their children. Here's a link about that.

From HERO: "If your child is currently enrolled in school you may withdraw them at any time, which is important if you want to avoid any future charges of truancy. To officially withdraw your child, inform the principal of the school, in writing. It is in your best interests to keep the letter brief, as shown in this sample withdrawal letter (pdf). No "homeschooling form" or registration of any kind is required by law. It isn't necessary to notify the school if your children have never been enrolled in your school district." I recommend also sending a copy to the Board of Education, but that's just my opinion.

There are a LOT of homeschool support groups in the Tulsa area. They organize things like sports teams, field trips, play groups, co-op classes, proms, yearbooks, reading incentive programs, and more. you can search for them, or, if you're willing to wait a week or two, I plan to compile a list on my blog soon. I personally belong to HERO and receive THE News.

There are as many choices as far a curriculum goes. You can use any of a number of pre-packaged programs, pick and choose for each subject, or completely write your own. Again, a google search will turn up thousands or more choices. We use Ambleside Online as our core with Math U See. This is a good fit for us, and is one of the more budget-friendly choices available as it requires not much more than a library card and an internet connection and printer. It may or may not be a good fit for you. As I said, there are a lot of choices.

You can also choose to use the same textbooks (including teacher's manuals) they use at the public schools. They're all available from the publishers, and you can sometimes find what you're looking for on eBay or Craigslist.

There's even a public school option in Oklahoma to teach your own children at home, using provided curriculum and supplies. You'd be responsible for everything including standardized testing with this option, but it's another choice to consider. You can read more about this at K12.com.

One of the best pieces of advice is this: if you try something and it isn't working for you or your child, try something else. There are too many choices to keep doing anything that makes either of you miserable.

There are conferences where you can view books and curriculum choices, attend workshops and lectures, visit with other parents, etc. There are virtual conferences, chat rooms, blogs, facebook groups and more dedicated to homeschoolers.

Homeschoolers also qualify for many of the discounts offered for teachers. For example, Joann fabrics offers a 15% discount (last time I checked) for educators and so do most area bookstores.

The Busy Mom's Bible, a review

2010-03-26T21:15:00.002-05:00

From the publisher:

The NIV Thinline Bible, Busy Mom's Edition is a trim, go-anywhere pocket Bible that gives you inspirational content quickly during the course of your day. Packed with one-minute thought starters and featuring the entire Old and New Testaments of the most-read, most-trusted NIV Bible, plus relevant and encouraging thoughts for the day … this is spiritual fuel for your busy mom-on-the-go lifestyle.

This Bible is simply a very lovely addition to my collection. The Italian pink/hot pink binding is soft, supple, and durable. It's very well bound and I can see I'll get many years' use from this Bible.

When they say "Thinline" they mean it. This Bible is at least 1/2 inch thinner than any other Bible I have.

The "Devotionals" are interspersed throughout this compact Bible, and each is broken into 1, 5, and 10 minute sections. You start with the one minute part, and if you have more time you use the 5 minute section as well. If you have more time than 5 minutes you can use the 10 minute section. It also provides additional scripture reading selections related to the lesson.

I've found it useful to start with the one minute section early in my day, and follow up again in the evening with the rest of the lesson. This allows me time to ruminate throughout the day, and brings a depth to the rest of the lesson that I may otherwise miss.

It also has a very nice section in the back (before the maps) of 5 minute readings on a variety of subjects, including "The Women of the Bible," "Friendship and Love," and "Jesus."

I enjoy using this Bible as a regular addition to my day, allowing me to supplement my regular reading with targeted readings for the issues I face every day. Its compact size and durable cover allow me to slip it into my tote when I take the children to their various activities, which makes it easy to request a short reading from the older ones while I'm driving. It also gives me something to read while the kids are busy.

I'd recommend this Bible to any busy mom looking for a compact NIV Bible. It's divine.

*I received a free copy of this item for review purposes. This is not a paid review.

Sigh...

2010-03-17T15:05:00.004-05:00

Dear Dentist Office;

I made an appointment a few weeks ago to bring two of my four children to your office today. When I called, I gave your staff all of their information, and asked if I'd be allowed in the exam rooms with them. I was assured there would not be a problem with that.

This morning, I got the grumpy kids up early, got everyone fed, teeth brushed, and dressed, and then drove 45 minutes to get to your office. I signed the kids in, and then sat with them in your waiting room for over an hour.

Finally, The Princess was called to go back by one of your nurses (or whatever they're called). We all stood up, and the nurse told me that she was going to take Princess back for x-rays and cleaning, that the dentist would take a look and see if he needed to do anything, and then she'd come back for me and Moose.

I stood there shaking my head while she was talking. She asked, "No?"

"No. That doesn't work for us." I said.

"Okay. What will work for you?"

"We all go back together, like I was told would happen when I made the appointment."

"Hang on, let me get the office manager for you."

Office manager: "We changed the policy after talking to other peds offices. We've found that kids just do better when the parents aren't with them."

"Well, that doesn't work for us."

"You're welcome to try to find another dentist that will let you." Scoffing. Almost snickering.

I canceled the appointment on the spot, and the one for next week for the other two kids.

One size fits all policies don't fit everyone. My kids, I'm sorry to say, are afraid of going to the dentist. They are not comfortable going back there without me. They need me to reassure them, to make sure nothing happens they haven't been told about, to hold their hands, to protect them.

I'm also not comfortable letting them go into an exam room alone. Even though I came to your office through a personal friend's recommendation, we don't know you. Maybe after we've met, after we have a working relationship, after the kids like you, after your demeanor has put us all at ease, after we trust you, after the kids are old enough to direct their own health care, I'd be willing to let the older kids go without me.

Until then, we're looking for a new dentist. Again. One that will respect my children, our time, previously agreed upon arrangements, and the fact that I make the decisions regarding their health care, including dental care. Me. Not you.

Sincerely,
A Mother Who Cares

p.s. It makes me sad to think most parents, even the ones that want to be with their kids, probably don't know they have a choice. Your attitude makes them think this, in a way similar to an obstetrician telling a pregnant mother she can't even try for a VBAC because it's not allowed. It is allowed. You don't have the right to make us think this.

Dreamed a baby boy.

2010-03-13T13:32:00.002-06:00

I don't dream about babies that don't (or won't) exist.

That said, I extremely, seriously, highly doubt it's mine. I suppose anything's possible, but it's not very likely.

So whose is it? Someone close to me is pregnant with a boy, or will be within a very few months. I've never dreamed about a baby that didn't come to be.

Yes, I dreamed I was the one pregnant. This actually just means I love and care a lot about the actual mother.

I dreamed that I was pregnant and due that day. It was nighttime, and I was standing by my bed all alone, and I was rubbing my belly and talking to the baby, saying it was time to come out and meet the world. At some point I squatted slightly, and his head came out into my underwear. I pulled them down and pushed once and caught him myself. I held him up and remember very distinctly seeing his penis, and then I hugged him to my chest and called for The Daddy. I told him to bring me the phone so I could call my midwife and see if she wanted to come see the baby. Then I wrapped him in a blanket and laid down on the bed and snuggled with him.

I asked him what we should name the little boy, and he said we should ask...the pappy? I think that's what he said.

And then I woke up.

I thought for a few minutes it was about my cousin's baby...but they already know they're having a boy, and they've known about the baby for a long time. Their baby is NOT this baby. I just know.

So, now I want very much to know...whose baby is it?!?

Double, double, toil and trouble!

2010-03-09T14:23:00.003-06:00

Between Shorty's meltdown, The Princess bursting out in hysterical sobs after what I thought was a perfectly nice Girl Scout meeting, The Daddy's grumpy, grouchy attitude over the lack of job prospects, Boo's poor behavior and jealousy, and my own insomnia/inability to keep a normal sleep schedule lately, things here have not been so fun.

The two older kids are mad at me.

The Princess does this every few months, crying about wanting to go back to school. She mostly gets upset when the girls at Scouts start talking about their teachers or assignments. She feels left out, like she's just permanently slightly outside the group. I've explained to her that, even if she did go to public school, it wouldn't be the same one these girls go to so her experiences would still be different. And, I've told her that most people, no matter how "in" they seem, also feel slightly "other". She's read stories about the grass being greener on the other side, being happy with what you have and who you are... this will pass, until it comes up again. :sigh:

Shorty is just angry in general. He says it's because he has so much work to do, between schoolwork and chores, but the truth is he only spends about 5 hours a day actually working. I think he just needs a severe attitude adjustment and better time management skills, in that order. We're working on it.

Boo, I think, just needs some time to adjust to the new school term. The older kids have been on a light workload for several weeks, and have had a lot more time to play and read with him. He needs more activities at the table, I think, so he'll feel more included. I'm working on that.

As for The Daddy, I don't have an easy answer. I think he needs to be willing to look more at what's possible for him to do, instead of concentrating quite so much on what he wants to do. We need $12,600 this year to make our budget, without any extras. That's $1800 a month if he starts May 1. That number drops to $1575 a month if he starts April 1. He could easily make $8 or more an hour and MORE than meet our budget if he'd be a little more willing to look at ads as possibilities instead of deciding off-hand that it doesn't pay enough, that it's too far away, or that he doesn't want to do that particular kind of job. THE SOONER HE FINDS *SOMETHING,* THE LESS HE'LL NEED TO MAKE! We *must* have a source of income by May 1, or we'll have to start selling stuff.

The stress of all this is really getting to me, which I think contributes greatly to my own problems. Getting another full time job outside the home and leaving the kids home with The Daddy again will not work for me. I can not do all the homeschool stuff and work full time. I did it for over a year, and all it did (besides bring in money) was wear me out and make me sick. I wasn't happy; the kids weren't happy; The Daddy wasn't happy. Nobody liked it except the people we pay every month.

I'm not saying I absolutely will not work outside the home full time. I'm saying it wouldn't be good for me, or for the kids. I've looked into working from home at least part time, and I could make that work if I had some support here to make it happen. What I can't do, is work full time while fighting to be able to. Every single thing I've suggested, The Daddy's shot down. Of course, none of this keeps him from showing me and telling me all about the jobs he comes across that he thinks *I* can do!

Apparently, I'm mad, too.

I have to keep reminding myself to keep the big picture in mind. This, too, shall pass. Homeschooling the kids is worth the struggle.

The "if only" monster still bugs me sometimes, though.

Swimming lessons

2010-03-07T12:44:00.003-06:00

Shorty and The Princess started taking swimming lessons last Wednesday. It's essentially a private lesson for the two of them, but I'm only paying the group rates because the instructor is new. I'm able to sit in the room with the pool and watch everything that's happening. Even though the instructor is new, there are two other experienced lifeguards with them at all times. I don't think I can imagine a better situation for them for right now.

Wednesday night, they learned how to freestyle. This means they can now swim with their faces in the water, looking down, and learned how to take a breath at the side while still swimming. They both still need a lot of practice, but overall it went very well.

I meant to take them yesterday to practice, but time just got away from us. Princess and I had to go man a Girl Scout cookie booth, and then couldn't participate in the other one because The Daddy called and needed us home to watch the boys while he helped a friend for a little while. Then he needed the big kids to help him pick up trash along the lane, and then he needed us to help him get ready to go teach his class today.

The kids want to go today, instead. Shorty, though, had a meltdown last night that has extended into today. I certainly can not allow him to go have fun, and I'm debating the merits of taking him out in public at all. He's just been such a hard person to live with the last few days.

We will not be taking him to Boy Scouts later this afternoon. He will not be allowed in the pool even if we do go. IF we go, he will have to exercise alongside me and will not be allowed out of my sight for any reason. At least that should help with his endurance. I can't think of any other way to *not* punish the other kids for his misbehavior. If The Daddy were home, I'd just leave him at home, too.

I only have an hour to decide. Will we go, or will it just be too much trouble?

I'm the mother of a teenager!

2010-02-26T18:22:00.003-06:00

Shorty is 13 today. For his birthday, The Daddy and I got him the pet he asked for, a short-haired hamster he named "Snowball" and sent him on a weekend campout with his new Boy Scout troop. We didn't even make him pay for it. Lucky kid.

Mimi and Opa gave him his own MP3 player, so he won't have to keep borrowing his sister's.

My sister is supposed to be in town this weekend, as her birthday is Sunday, but I haven't heard from her.

Thirteen.

I have a teenage son.

Wow.

My first carnival!

2010-02-23T02:01:00.002-06:00

I've been included in this week's Carnival of Homeschooling! Check it out here!

asking for permission

2010-02-20T20:50:00.003-06:00

From the time we're very small, we're told to ask for permission. "What's the magic word?" our parents would cajole. As we got older our manners became so ingrained that "please" and "may I" came almost unbidden to our lips.

I've noticed something in the email lists, forums, and chat rooms I visit sometimes. Most of the time, it's the mom/teacher asking, "Can I make this change?", "Can I substitute this book for that?" or, "Is it okay if I . . .?"

These requests don't have the tone of someone asking advice. They're not asking, "Does this book have the same properties as that?" or, "What would you do?" so that they can make an informed decision. They're asking for permission to change the curriculum to suit their specific family's needs. Let me say it again. They're asking for permission.

Why did you start homeschooling in the first place? Did you, as we most certainly did, feel compelled to direct the course of our children's education? Did you feel, as I did, that my husband and I know our children better than anyone else, and that there was no one better qualified to make decisions on their behalf than our family?

For the record, I spent many, many hours searching, praying, reading, learning, reviewing, and debating the merits of one choice vs. another before reaching the conclusion that our current curricula fits our family best. It's not even the first one we tried. The point is, we made a decision, and if we feel changes need to be made, from a single book to an entire program change, we make it. Sometimes we ask other homeschoolers for advice. Sometimes we even ask for encouragement.

What we don't do is ask for permission. First, because there isn't a soul on Earth with the authority required for me to ask them permission to make a change of this type. Second...well, there doesn't need to be another reason. That's it. I'm not asking anyone's permission to use a specific book, to have the kids do something extra, to remove a component of the curriculum that seems useless to us, or to let the kids skip school sometimes.

Make your decisions. Change your mind if you feel the need. Or, keep subjecting yourself to the will of others. That's a choice you can make, too.

May I please have a hall pass to use the bathroom now?

Books, Books, Books!

2010-02-09T19:53:00.002-06:00

I gave up and just ordered the books we need for this coming school year last night. I felt it was the only way to get the 1st priority list completely fulfilled in time. I only ordered math books, a globe and a U. S. map, and those of the other books that were unavailable from the library and not available free online, literature of great worth, or, like their main history books, will be used ALL year, multiple years, and for both older kids (IOW, reference books).

What I ordered:

And Just for Mom:

The Original Homeschooling Series
Charlotte Mason Study Guide

Is it still surgery if nothing was cut?

2010-02-06T20:12:00.004-06:00

Monday morning, I called the doctor. Princess woke up with her ear hurting so much she was crying. The doctor's office called back a few minutes later saying to bring her right in.

While Princess and I were getting ready, Daddy was on his computer. We were almost ready when he asked why Boo wasn't getting dressed. "Umm...because I'm taking Princess?"

Turns out Boo was up at 6am with the same thing. So we got him ready and took him with us.

The doctor's office was nice enough to squeeze him in as well, and it didn't take too long to get back to an exam room. Princess's temp was normal, but Boo's was 103. :(

She looked in Princess's ears and they were both infected. Then she looked in Boo's. The left one was infected, but I heard her say "Whoa, mama!" under her breath when she looked in his right ear.

She said there was a growth, something maybe like a cyst, that should clear up with the antibiotics she prescribed, but she wanted him to see an ENT right away to make sure. She showed it to me, and it seemed to be attached to his eardrum, a 3-d nightmare extending out toward the otoscope. Angry and reddish, and covered in earwax, it didn't look good.

The ENT had an opening Tuesday afternoon. We arrived in his office a full 35 minutes early (I hate being late). He peeked in with his light and a little funnel... "Hmm...it looks like a bead of some sort."

Sure enough, the kid had a bead stuck in his ear. That was the good news: not a cyst, not something worse, just a bead. Unfortunately, though, he couldn't get it out there in his office (not for lack of trying) because it was just really wedged in there and that area is extremely sensitive. My poor Boo.

We had to go to the hospital to have it removed. The ENT made an appointment for us for Friday morning. Boo had to be completely knocked out for the full 30 seconds it took for him to remove the thing.

The boy was very brave. We explained everything, several times, in very plain language, and he understood perfectly well what was going to happen. When the anesthesiologist told him he'd be back in a minute with some "candy to drink" the Boo asked him if he meant the "don't care medicine."

Everyone was calling what was done a "surgery." He didn't get an IV, just gas through a mask and some oral medicine. Nothing was cut. Was it really surgery?

Making a list, checking it twice...

2010-01-30T18:59:00.002-06:00

I completed the Amazon wish lists for the kids' school books, in order of priority. I'm so happy. Now I have a nice printout with new prices included and used prices handwritten in, to take with me when I go book shopping in a couple of weeks. Our new term starts March 1. I'm so excited. The kids, less so, but that's okay.

The Princess is really struggling with math. We've been using Math-u-See, and she's really been lagging, not understanding the concepts...I've had to print TONS of supplemental worksheets for her and she just doesn't get it. I think maybe the blocks are messing her up. Shorty understands the concept the first time he sees it and never needs the blocks to do the problems, but Princess is having a lot of trouble.

Today, we put the blocks away and I just explained to her how to do the problems the way I was taught back in "the olden days," aka elementary school. She seemed to understand that just fine. If she retains it tomorrow we'll try it for a few weeks and see how that goes. Maybe this program will be fine for her with a little modification. Maybe not. We'll reevaluate soon and change what needs to be changed. 'Tis one of the joys of homeschooling. :)

This cold...

2010-01-28T21:46:00.002-06:00

...and I don't just mean the coughing, hacking, headachy, awful cold I've had for the last 10 days or so that's now making its way through my family.

No, I mean the cold outside. Freezing rain, 29 degrees outside right now, down to 25 or so by dawn...more sleet/freezing rain overnight and snow tomorrow.

The busier roads in town get sand/salt but...I don't live in town. Everything out here is icy and slippery.The Daddy says it's a 10 minute commute from the bottom step of our porch to the top; it's a full five steps. Yay.

Homeschooling update

2010-01-23T15:26:00.003-06:00

Shorty and the Princess are on a lightened load for this winter, with a regular schedule starting in March. Our new folder system has made a HUGE impact, not only on reducing the amount of time I have to put in scheduling things and making assignments, but also in their willingness to buckle down and get the work done.

The system is this: they each get a color coded folder (pink for the Princess, orange for Shorty, yellow for Boo, and green for Moosie when he's big enough). In the folder are several notebook pages with headings such as"Math," "Poetry," "Bible," and one for each book they're reading (Boo has a couple of reading logs, one for picture books the kids read to him, and one for chapter books I read to him). They also get worksheets for things like handwriting and anything special I come up with.

On the math page, they're required to write the date, the assignment, and the score they earned on each line. For poetry, they write the date, the poem, and a short narration (either what the poem was about, or whether they liked it and why). On each book page, I've broken down their reading into what I feel are manageable chunks for each school day, and they write the date completed next to each assignment.

When everything in their folder is written on, school's over and they have free time. In the evening, after supper, I ask to see their folders. Narrations take the form of the kids telling me about what they learned. If the oral narrations are substandard, they know a written essay will result, so their narrations are usually very good. Sometimes I assign an essay, a picture (either drawn or with color), or another form of supplemental work regardless of how the oral narrations went...

While we're doing narrations, I go through their folders. I change out any worksheets completed, review progress, add assignments, etc. I usually already have these printed/chosen from our books and ready to add. This phase of our school day normally takes about 10 minutes per kid.

This is working well, and I'm confident when our new term starts in March it'll be simple to add the new books into our system.

Pictures from Christmas, Halloween, and the Blizzard of 2009

2009-12-30T20:13:00.007-06:00

and the geese in the field behind the house...

Shorty's New Scout Troop

2009-12-13T17:22:00.005-06:00

The same troop we visited invited Shorty to a lock-in this last Friday night. He stayed up all night playing video games, eating pizza, running around, and generally acting like a kid. He had a great time. He said the boys were all very nice to him.

Shorty, of his own volition, removed all the troop number patches from all his shirts over the last couple of weeks. He says it was to make room for this troop's patches. He and The Daddy are on their way back now from a regular meeting, which also happened to be a Court of Honor. The boy had a great time, and came back with his recharter paperwork. Looks like this is it.

It's a good thing I waited.

2009-12-11T21:33:00.004-06:00

The creative writing bug bit my daughter. She wrote 3 more stories today...I'm glad I didn't turn it into an assignment. I'd probably have killed the urge. She's amazing.

The Frost Dragon

2009-12-10T18:43:00.003-06:00

The Princess, with very little in the way of prompting, wrote a story for her little brothers today. It's a beautiful story about a fearful country, a dragon everyone thinks will eat them, and a little boy who comes to the rescue. She wrote it on the computer, but is not ready to share it with anyone else yet. I think tomorrow I may sit down with her and carefully suggest some self-editing. Once she says it's ready I'll ask for some illustrations and then print and bind it. It's truly a worthy story.

Scouting for a new troop

2009-11-22T22:28:00.002-06:00

Our Boy Scout troop visit today went very well. We arrived just in time for their opening flag ceremony. There were only about eight scouts present, as most of the boys were with their families for Thanksgiving week, but two of them were Eagles.

The adults went out of their way to welcome us, to answer all our questions, and to invite us to join in. The boys just folded Shorty into their activities.

This is a very boy-led, boy-run group, and I think our family would fit in well there.

I don't know if Daddy wants to join, but Shorty was enthusiastic. I convinced him to join them in one of their activities and another regular meeting before we decide, though.

More on Thanksgiving

2009-11-21T21:42:00.003-06:00

Apparently, she has a doctor's appointment Tuesday, so she's spending the holiday there at his aunt's house.

No idea yet whether Mom will actually be off or not, so...whatever.

Thanksgiving is cancelled, or something.

2009-11-20T19:57:00.003-06:00

My sister got married last year, and I haven't seen her since. Last year, she spent both Thanksgiving and Christmas with her new husband and his family. This year, she was planning to come here for Thanksgiving and spend Christmas with his family, but now she's not. No reasonable explanation, other than our mother (maybe) having to work that day.

I understand that she may not want to come if we can't all be here, but I miss my sister. I haven't seen her in over a year. She's definitely not coming for Christmas, and I'm reverting to my 3 year old self whining about how unfair it is.

In light of this, I've advised Mom and Dad that if, indeed, Mom has to work on Thanksgiving, we're postponing our celebration until Sunday. If that does not work out, we'll just have our own celebration. It might be nice to cook a 10 lb turkey instead of a monster for a change.

A twice per year blogger?

2009-11-19T18:56:00.002-06:00

Apparently, I'm not so good at the task of keeping up with this blog. I've just been...well, swamped is a good word.

Work continues to provide a source of much-needed adult conversation for me, although the work itself is more akin to being at home. Teaching adults how to read a bill or how to use the remote controls for their televisions both frustrates and amuses me greatly.

The children amaze me. The Moosie seems obsessed with everything dinosaur related lately. Everything is "saurasaurus," "birdasaurus," "toothasaurus," etc. I've no idea where he comes up with some of the things he says sometimes. Just today, he got a toy stuck in the doorway of his play treehouse.
"It's stuck in door," he said.
Daddy said, "Yes, it's stuck in the door. Do you want help getting it out?"
"Idea," he chirped, holding up one finger, "I go, I go!"
And he ran off to find a big kid to come help him. Why Daddy or I couldn't do it I'll never know, but apparently he thought Daddy had a good idea.

Boo is learning to read, slowly. We're concentrating on the phonograms, just beginning to put them together. He's finally interested, truly curious about how this "reading" thing happens. He's taking on more of the household chores, taking turns at washing the windows and helping to clear and set the table, feeding the cat, things like that. He's definitely of an independent temperament, wanting to do everything for himself. I must take care not to assign him a task he may not be ready to do alone, as he becomes very angry if anyone even offers to help him or take over his work.

The Princess bridged up to Cadette level in Girl Scouts this past week. Her troop leader is amazing. Almost all the girls earned the Bronze Award, and the troop started this year with just as many girls as it ended with last summer. The Princess is so much stronger, self-confident, and more outgoing than I ever was. Watching her interact with her friends brings me so much joy. Thankfully, she's still comfortable talking to me about her feelings and the changes that are happening... she's definitely pre-pubescent. Her attitude sometimes gets her in trouble, but a stern word usually corrects the issue.

We're searching for a new Boy Scout troop for Shorty. The short version of the story is that we disagreed with the leadership about the boys' merit badge work. I hope we find a good fit for him soon, as he seems quite discouraged. He understands, though, that the work he does will earn him the recognition he deserves, and that he'll be able to take pride in knowing that he did his best and did everyhing that was required to earn it.

The older children are progressing in their schoolwork faster than I can afford to replace their books. We're availing ourselves as much as we can of the ones published free online, and we visit the library every week, but I still have to buy math, science, and some other books and materials. Fortunately, they still learn a lot just from being outside, helping to care for their younger siblings, and learning to run a household. Cooking, baking, and various handicrafts like crochet and sewing round out our days.

Foreign language and musical instrument lessons are on the horizon. Daddy and I disagree on which foreign language we should start with though. He says they'd get the most benefit from learning Spanish. I agree, but know that *any* language would be helpful to their progress, and don't want them to learn *only* Spanish. I fear that if we start with Spanish, there will be little, if any, incentive to try something else. I'd love for them also to learn French, Greek, and/or German, not to mention Latin.

I find myself struggling often with feelings of defiance, sadness, and frustration. I'm home from work 3 days a week, but it's just not enough to get everything done. If I'm not here, the children get very little of their schoolwork done. In addition, the regular chores seem further and further behind every week. I wish the Daddy would be more strict about their schooling, both with them and with himself. I sometimes feel like he's just here to make sure they don't burn down the house. I know it's uncharitable to say that, but I can't help feeling that way. I just somehow feel that, if I'm the only one planning lessons, I'm the only one making sure they get done, and I'm the only one doing any encouraging, that I should have the freedom to choose their course of study. He's their father, though, and I'm afraid not to let him have some input.

The children, last night on our way to the library, got into a HUGE debate (fight) about how many and what colors Anakin's lightsabers were in the Star Wars movies. I quietly chuckled all the way to town.

So bad, I am.

2009-01-24T11:15:00.003-06:00

The Moose is now almost a year old. He was born February 11, 2008, at home surrounded by our family.

The birth was (almost) everything I hoped it would be. The only thing I would have changed was to possibly have use of my bathtub during labor.

All in all, though, it went very well. Less than 2 hours from the beginning of real labor to baby.

In other news, I'm now working, Daddy is the homemaker, The Princess is starting a new journey, the two oldest are now very active in Scouting again, and life is good. Crazy, but good.

Welcome back to the party.

My Birth Plan

2007-10-22T00:31:00.001-05:00

I want to go into labor peacefully, on my own, sometime after January 15th but before Saint Patrick's Day.

I want to labor and give birth in my home, surrounded by people who love and support me and my family.

I want to have the freedom to do whatever I wish during labor. I want to drink whatever I want, eat whatever I want, go wherever I want, assume any position I want, snuggle with whomever I choose, and kick out anyone who doesn't like it!

I want to have internal exams only when and if I ask for them. I do not want them to be offered to me, until I feel like pushing (and I may not want one then).

I want my children to be encouraged, comforted, and cared for by loving, confident, unafraid adults while I labor and deliver their new sibling into our home. I want them to have every question they ask to be answered with total honesty. I want them to witness the miracle unfolding, but I do not want them to be pressured in any way to do anything, be anywhere, or see anything that they do not wish.

I want the baby's heart rate to be monitored often and externally, but not continuously, and I want the volume on the monitor to be turned down very low.

I want my waters to remain intact until they rupture spontaneously or the baby's head is out, whichever comes first. :)

I want myself or my husband to "catch" the baby and bring it immediately to my bare chest or stomach, and both of us to be covered with warm towels or blankets.

I want to discover for myself the sex of the child. If one of the children were to see first and blurt it out, I would not be angry. If, however, one of the adults did, I would be IRATE!

I want to wait to push until my body tells me it is ready. I do not want to be told when or how to push.

I want to deliver the child with the maximum amount of peacefulness possible. I want there to be no pulling, pushing, or otherwise "manipulating" the baby during delivery without a true medical reason. Likewise, I want there to be no suctioning of the newborn, no vigorous rubdown, and no jostling/bouncing the baby with the express purpose of making the child cry. I also want the lights as dim as possible during the birth.

I want to wait until the cord stops pulsing to have it clamped and cut. I want an immediate family member to cut the cord.

I want the baby's immediate family's greetings to be the first sounds our child hears. I want everyone else to be as silent as possible during the delivery and immediately following the birth.

I want myself and my husband, followed by our children, to be the first ones to hold our new baby. Everyone else will just have to be patient. I do not want the baby taken out of anyone's arms (but especially mine) until they (I) offer. :)

I want to breastfeed our new child as soon as possible after the birth, which may delay the possibility of anyone else holding our baby. Too bad.

I want there to be no eye drops or ointment, no shots, no blood draws or heel pricks, and nothing given to or placed in our child's mouth except my breast and breast milk.

I want our child not to leave my sight, ever, for any reason. I want weighing and measuring to be delayed until everyone has had a chance to greet our baby. I want to be involved in our child's first bath.

I want someone to take lots and lots of pictures and/or video the whole thing. :)

Gestating in Peace

2007-10-09T13:37:00.000-05:00

I'm in a state of advanced peacefulness. This baby is growing, moving, and thriving, safe in my womb.

I've officially decided to plan on a home birth. This alleviates SO MUCH of the pressure, I just can't even put it into words. I've hired a midwife and doula, and they're both so very wonderful. I'm still seeing my OB for tests and so I'll know him...and more importantly, so he'll know me if something happens that makes me want to be in the hospital. I'm not going to tell him I'm planning a homebirth until it's much closer to being a reality, though.

So, from now on, I'll be going over to my midwife's house after each OB appt (2 minutes from the hospital and OB's office). Except for the one next Monday. She's coming to that one with me, as it's the ultrasound, and then we'll all go over to her house for some visiting. Double prenatals. LOL.

My husband is being very supportive of my plans for this birth, which, at the beginning of this journey I would have said was impossible. But he is, and for that I am grateful.

My father GETS IT! He was in a car accident in his twenties and had his spleen removed. He has a vertical scar on his abdomen, and says it caused him a great deal of pain...FOR YEARS! He totally understands me wanting to do what's necessary to avoid going through another cesarean. Also, he totally gets me not wanting to do all the "necessary" newborn stuff: Vit K, HEP B, eye goop, etc. He says that just because they have it at their disposal to use and that's what they've always done does not mean it's necessary or good. HA!

Now my poor mother, on the other hand... I wish she'd get it. She's very, very scared, to the point of almost crying on the phone when I told her I don't plan to go to the hospital. I sent her tons of links and articles and stuff. I hope... I hope she conquers her fears enough for her to be able to come over and take care of the children while I'm in labor. I'd really like her and Opa to reassure them, explain what's happening, encourage them to help, make sure they're fed, etc. but I need her to be able to set aside her fear to do that...otherwise the kids will feel it and I don't want them to be afraid. I guess all I can do now is wait, answer her questions, and hope for the best. Her feelings are not my responsibility.

I've been crocheting woolies. :) Wool diaper covers, a hat, and now I'm working on a itty bitty sweater. I'll make LO a blanket next, and then I'm going to start sewing up a bunch of fitted cloth diapers. I figure if I'm gonna do the hippie thing, I might as well do it up right, neh?! LOL!

The house is slowly coming back together again, after this summer's upheaval. It's still not where I need it to be for the birth, but it's a lot closer, and getting better every day.

Oh yeah...I get a baby shower this time! Woohooooo! Fourth child and I've never had one. After Boo, we got rid of everything except the few special items, so we're pretty much starting from next to nothing for this one, so this is a most welcome surprise. My mom is planning it for the end of January. Here's hoping the shower comes before the baby. :D

The Amazing Exploding Uterus

2007-09-19T20:37:00.001-05:00

I am not broken. I am capable of giving birth. I am more than just my uterus, and my uterus is NOT going to explode.

I am going to have a VBAC. I am going to have a beautiful, natural, peaceful birth.

I am not a number. I am not a statistic. I am woman. I will roar!

I'm BACK!!

2007-08-26T17:47:00.000-05:00

After a long hiatus, I'm back to my blog.

Sorry to anyone who missed me while I was away...I just had a lot on my plate.

Let's see...where to begin...

Best news first, I guess. Baby #4 will be here sometime before March, 2008. We're all very excited, if a bit surprised. Not a clue yet on the pink/blue question, so yellows and greens are all that's in our registry.

We're planning a VBAC for this delivery, and my doctor seems (mostly) supportive. He did say he'd want to schedule me for a RCS if I don't go into labor by 41 weeks which I think is BS, but I've chosen to go along with that for now and fight him on it if it comes to that. I'm also going to start interviewing doulas in a couple of weeks.

Meanwhile, all that pain I had toward the end of my pregnancy with Boo? Yep, it's back, almost as bad now as at the end of the last one, and I'm miserable. Telephone interviews with chiropractors begin tomorrow morning. I'm looking for one who works with lots of pregnant women and is Webster certified. Good luck to me.

I went out today and found a couple more pairs of pants that FIT, look nice, and didn't cost me an arm and a leg. Why, oh why, don't stores that have "maternity" departments carry sizes larger than XL? Even the ones that have decent "plus-sized" departments? Do they think big women want to look cute, but will never have sex? I'm living proof that fat women get pregnant, too...so why is it so hard to find clothes that fit? For the record, I found a decent selection at Motherhood Maternity, up to 3X.

I had to go find some more clothes because I have to go to a funeral tomorrow. Opa's uncle (my great-uncle) died last week, so we're driving down to Chickasha tomorrow for a family luncheon and his funeral service.

Homeschooling has been...intermittent this summer, but will resume again full force mid-September.

And now, I'm pooped. Time to go make dinner and get ready for tomorrow. :(

I'm sick.

2007-02-24T14:32:00.000-06:00

Baby Boo was sick for most of the week, and, now that he's mostly over it, I find that he was ever so kind as to share his bug with his dear mother.

It's horrible.

:sigh: I was supposed to go to a baby shower today.

My stomach is cramping and my head is throbbing/swimming and I just know that pretty soon I'll be spending most of my time in the bathroom. Ick, ick, ick.

Guess Daddy will have to take Shorty and The Princess to their karate lesson Monday. It'll also be Shorty's birthday. Poor guy, looks like his party may have to be postponed. :(

If only he'd sleep normal-person-hours.

2007-02-12T02:28:00.000-06:00

"No, I didn't tell you marshmallows would be okay for breakfast."
"No, I didn't say you could have chocolate milk, either."
"No, I wouldn't have said you could have pudding for breakfast, either."
"Okay then, where was I?"
"And what time was it?"
"Since when are you allowed to ask me for stuff when I'm sleeping, and at 4:45AM!?!"
"Yes, of course you're in trouble. You've been told not to do that."
"Yes, I know you can't help it that you have so much energy. Unfortunately, YOU made the decision to eat nothing but sugar for breakfast, so YOU are responsible for what your body does because of it."
"It makes me sad that you'll have to miss some fun stuff this week, too. Hopefully, you'll remember to make better choices so you won't be grounded too long. You already know the rules. Should we post them in your room again to help you remember?"
"Okay. Do you want to help me make the poster this afternoon?"

Don't read this if stories of child abuse really bother you.

2007-01-27T15:09:00.000-06:00

It's over, and she didn't have to go through a trial. For that, I'm thankful.

This horrible excuse for a human raped and molested a little girl, from the time she was less than 3 years old (possibly younger) until she was 13. When she was little, she would tell stories about how her "tushie hurts" and that he "did it." This was reported to DHS, and she was examined by a pediatrician, but the evidence was inconclusive.

Later, she would complain (at about 10 years old) that he would watch her take showers, and insist on "helping" her wash.

I'm still sad I couldn't do more to protect her. Legally, though, I did all I could. If only I'd known, before all this started, I never would have agreed to help him get custody (and even establish paternity) in the first place.

That's right. She was his own daughter. Ugh.

No posts in a while...

2007-01-22T01:56:00.000-06:00

Sorry. The quick catch-up: Everybody's fine, Christmas was awesome, the weather here stinks, but the view out my sliding glass door is glorious.

The longer version: Boo regressed. He's back to daipers. :( I'm not sure what happened, but he just...started having accidents, and then didn't go #2 in the potty anymore, and now has more accidents than successes. I'm not worried, just disappointed. I was *almost* free. ;)

We had a really bad ice storm last week, and, though we never lost power or anything, lots of people did. One county's water department even shut down for a while. Some people are STILL without power, but most are back on.

The kids got lots of cool stuff for Christmas, but the best part was, the day before when they were re-writing their official letters to Santa (to leave next to the milk and cookies), and they, all three, asked for BOOKS! :D Yes, my wee little geeks-in-training asked Santa Claus for books.

Fortunately, Santa already had a boatload of books for them in his pack. We've killed our old hodgepodge of curriculum, and we're doing Ambleside Online, and our old math books...but I plan to change those this summer, too. More than half the books needed are online for free (some even as audio books!) and the rest we found at a really good price. There are less than 6 books each that they still need for the rest of the year, and they'll probably get those for their birthdays.

It's so wonderful. They're ASKING every morning to PLEASE do school NOW, because they want to see what happens to Paddle (Paddle-to-the-Sea by Holling C. Holling), or what happens next in Britian (An Island Story by H. E. Marshall). Homeschool is no longer a chore. I couldn't be happier, and I know they love it as well. :)

We've also started using Sparkpeople.com. It's an online, completely free, wonderful weight loss, nutrition, and exercise tracker, tool, and community. My user name over there is RayannB. Look me up.

Let's see...what else...umm...not much.

I have a bad headache, but can't sleep. That's about it. Will post pictures soon.

No more daipers! Yay!!

2006-12-18T18:18:00.000-06:00

Yep, that's right, Baby Boo is officially completely potty trained!

He had a really bad daiper rash that wouldn't clear up, and we eventually got to the point where he was just wearing underwear all the time because it was the only thing he could stand to have on. I guess he didn't like the feeling of urine running down his legs, because he'd cry every time he had an accident. Of course, he'd gone once or twice in the potty before this, so he knew how to avoid that feeling...and he hasn't pooped in a daiper in about a month, after I showed him that Mama poops in the potty and then she gets to flush it...and he likes to flush, so he goes #2 in the potty. :)

He's been clean and dry for almost a week, even overnight. His daiper rash is gone. We're very happy.

In other news, all our Christmas shopping is done. All that's left is assembly of a couple of items and some wrapping, which Daddy and I will do Thursday, when Opa will be here to watch the kids for us. I can't wait for Christmas morning!

Letter to Santa, From Mom

2006-12-03T16:59:00.000-06:00

I got this from a friend in my email and thought it was so wonderful I had to save it here.

Dear Santa,
I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my children on demand, visited their doctor's office more than my own doctor's, and sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground.
I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt, in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when ! I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.
Here are my Christmas wishes: I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (in any color, except purple, which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze; but are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aisle in the grocery store.
I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month of my last pregnancy.
If you're hauling big ticket items this year, I'd like fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music; a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals; and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.
On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with two kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools.
I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother", because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.
If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a styrofoam container.
If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely.
It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.
Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is ringing and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back.
Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in to dry off so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.
Yours Always, MOM
P.S. One more thing ... you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children young enough to believe in Santa.

More pictures.

2006-12-02T19:52:00.000-06:00

Here's one of our Thanksgiving turkey. Ain't it a beaut?

Here's one of the gang that came for Thanksgiving. The adults from left to right are Unkie, Sis, Opa, Mimi, and J (mom's friend). The kids are, of course, my monsters.

And here's me and the kids on Thanksgiving.

Here's Shorty and The Princess building a snowman earlier today during recess. As you can see from the hay bales in the background, they were at the edge of our yard. I didn't go outside, though, even to take this picture. Brrrr! Love the snow, hate the cold!

KQ TAGGED ME!

2006-12-02T19:21:00.000-06:00

1. Egg nog or hot chocolate? Both! :) Ketchupqueen's Extra Yummy, Super Special Recipe Hot Chocolate for those cold afternoons. Egg nog almost anytime, but usually with Christmas breakfast.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Wraps them. After all, how could we have a giant wrapping paper fight if he didn't?!?

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? Colored lights on the tree, no lights on the house. Although we do go look at lights around town, and we like colored ones best.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Nope.

5. When do you put your decorations up? Usually, Thanksgiving Day, but this year we still don't have them all up, though we will by Tuesday. Then I'll take pictures and try to post them up. :)

6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)? TURKEY!

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child: Helping Mom do the "Santa thing" for my baby sister, who was, I think, 5 at the time. We went to a huge toy store, and I got to help pick out tons of toys for her, and then Mom had me wait in the car for like, half an hour, while she "ran in to get something she forgot." But really, she was getting my presents, and I pretended I didn't know.

8. How and when did you learn the truth about Santa? I think I was eight or nine, and I'd been telling Mom and Dad I "believed" for a couple of years because they'd said, years before, that children who didn't believe in Santa didn't get presents from him. :)

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? Yes! We always open three presents each on Christmas Eve. One is always slippers. One is pajamas. And the last one is a surprise. The rest have to wait for morning.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree? We have a pre-lit fake tree, which we love (well, I love it because I hate doing the lights) and we put all the ornaments we have on it, from the ones my parents got the first year they were married, to the ones I made in elementary school, my sister's play-dough ornaments, and my own children's creations. Every year I get a new ornament or set from my husband. The tree is getting full. :)

11. Snow! Love it or dread it? LOVE IT!

12. Can you ice skate? I used to be able to, but since I had kids and blew up like a blimp, my center of gravity has shifted so much I can't anymore. :(

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? The afghan my mother made for me one year. She worked on it night and day for WEEKS and then, three weeks before Christmas, it was "stolen" while I was at school one day. When I opened that box and saw the afghan, I was so happy my mother's work wasn't stolen after all I cried! She'd staged the "robbery" and hidden it in the freezer!

14. What's the most important thing about the holidays for you? That I remember how very blessed we are, and that my children have good memories. Not lots of stuff, just lots of memories. :)

15. What is your favorite holiday dessert? My mom's fruit salad, hands down. A close runner-up is my apple pie.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Every year on Christmas Eve, the children and I mix up a batch of "reindeer food" to sprinkle out in the yard. The glitter in it helps the reindeer find our house, and the oatmeal is a nice snack for them to eat while Santa's busy. Every Christmas morning, the "reindeer food" is gone. :)

17. What tops your tree? Lighted, multicolored star.

18. Which do you prefer, giving or receiving? Giving is such fun for me that my present every year from my mom and sister is a contribution to the "Santa fund," so I can buy whatever I want to get the kids and the rest of the family.

19. What is your favorite Christmas song? "Mary, did you know?"

I'm only tagging one person, because I don't have any other blog friends yet. :) Tag, Jodey, you're it!

Just how mad would Daddy be...

2006-11-27T02:55:00.000-06:00

...if I changed the children's curriculum? We've spent a small fortune on it, but I just can't get into it. I don't know if it would be better if we'd just bought one of those pre-packaged, all-in-one things or not, but our current hodge-podge isn't working very well for me, and I'm afraid that my attitude will affect the kids soon if something doesn't change.

I've spent most of this week researching (well, re-researching, since I've done this many times now) trying to find the right thing for us. Unschooling isn't an option, since Daddy wants measurable progress. What we've been using is mostly Scott Foresman textbooks for math, science, and social studies, a Spanish program I really like, and "real books" for language arts.

I just don't feel like the textbooks are challenging enough for the kids. Textbooks nowadays just seem very "dumbed down," even from what I used when I was in school, and that wasn't really all that long ago (though you may have some trouble convincing the kids of that).

Our language arts program is coming along very well. Shorty is currently reading at about a seventh grade level and writing full, complete paragraphs and short essays with correct grammar and punctuation. The Princess (she was at beginning kindergarten level when I took her out of PS in the first grade) is now reading at the fourth grade level and is writing complete sentences and short stories. Both of them still need a lot of work on their handwriting, but I see this as far less important as being able to express a coherent thought in the written language. :)

What's worked in this area that isn't working in the textbooks? We use wonderful, real, well-written books. We take our time reading and enjoying the language. We read poetry. We choose stories together.

I think I need some Charlotte Mason books...Santa? Oh, Santa!?

A mixed-up Thanksgiving

2006-11-25T14:01:00.000-06:00

Thanksgiving, as usual, was here at our house. Daddy got his free turkey from work (a 14 1/2 pound Honeysuckle White) and I started cooking at 6am Thursday morning. We were expecting Mimi and Opa (my mom and dad) and Sis and Unkie (my sister and her...umm...other half).

It took some persuading on my part to get my husband to agree to let Unkie come to Thanksgiving. He has a thing about letting people he doesn't know in the house, particularly when he's here. Also, he doesn't deal well with changes in plan.

Anyway, Mimi was supposed to bring green beans, rolls, pumpkin pudding, and sweet potatoes. Sis was supposed to bring relish trays and salad. I made turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, apple pie, stuffed mushrooms, and had the giblets all ready for Mimi to make the gravy when she got here. Mimi forgot the sweet potatoes. Oops.

So, I had Daddy all set to be polite and eat dinner with us, even though he wasn't thrilled about Unkie coming. I'm in the kitchen when everyone arrives; the kids run outside to help carry food in.

I see Mimi first. She's smiling radiantly, giving me a huge hug. I see Opa behind her...but in between them is someone I don't know. At least, someone I didn't recognize.

Turns out one of Mimi's friends found out (very) late Wednesday night that her son (who is in the Army) wouldn't be able to celebrate Thanksgiving with her after all, and she had no one else to spend the holiday with, so Mimi invited her to join us.

I don't mind at all that she came (if I'd known, I would've invited her myself and made it okay with Daddy) but NOTHING was said about her coming, even though I'd talked to Mimi several times that morning.

Anyway, when Daddy saw her he went into his computer room. A few minutes later I took him a couple of the mushrooms I'd made just for him. He asked me to shut the door. He asked who that was, and I told him how she came to join us...he said he wouldn't be coming out of his room and if I wanted to bring him food, that was fine but he wouldn't be eating with us. Fine.

So, we had Thanksgiving without Daddy. I took him a big plate of food when it was time to eat, and I otherwise didn't worry about him. He's a grown man. I just wish he'd act like it more often.

We had a lovely time. The food was awesome, if I do say so myself. We all made huge pigs of ourselves, sat around and gabbed the afternoon away, and then played a hilarious board game called Cranium. Everyone left at about 7pm, and took most of the leftovers with them (thank goodness).

Daddy, though, says his Thanksgiving was ruined. He went to the store last night and bought another turkey. He wants to have "another Thanksgiving" Monday. Of course, I "get" to cook it. And clean up after it. And plan what to do with the leftovers. Oh, well. It could be worse. I could be a bad cook. ;)

Bliss...

2006-11-20T00:29:00.000-06:00

I just had a very nice evening, and thought I'd share...

First, the kids were very well behaved this afternoon. They got all their schoolwork done in record time and then cleaned up the living room, did dishes, and scrubbed their bathroom. All without being asked. Boo even cleaned up the trash that had acumulated between my desk and the wall.

Then they helped me make dinner. Spaghetti and meatballs, garlic bread and green beans. I barely had to do anything. Just dump the hot pot through the strainer. They did the rest. Dinner was ready just as Daddy came in, so we set the table while he changed.

After dinner, I got on the computer and surfed awhile while the kids watched the History of Thanksgiving (I think that's what it was called) on the History Channel. When that was over, Shorty wanted to go to bed. (He's an early riser, like Daddy). So he went to bed. Boo and Princess decided to have "toddler school" and turned the TV off.

That's when Daddy suggested that I "go get away for a while." !!!!! "Spend some time alone. Go lay down and read or take a bath or something." !!!!!

WOOT! For an hour, I lay in my huge bathtub, very warm lightly oiled water soaking the aches out of my body. With a book. :) It was heavenly.

While I was in the bath, Daddy got Boo ready for bed, sent Princess to bed, and then lay in bed reading to Boo.

I'm feeling very spoiled. Wonder what's gonna happen tomorrow...

New links added to homeschool section

2006-11-19T17:00:00.000-06:00

I've added some links to the toolbar on the right. Check them out, especially those of you with little ones!

Something in the water...

2006-11-18T02:06:00.000-06:00

No, I'm not pregnant. No, I'm not planning to become pregnant anytime soon.

During my pregnancy with Boo, I was absolutely certain this would be the last child for me. It was a hard pregnancy, and I only ever wanted three kids anyway, so I asked my doctor to do a tubal during my c-section. Guess what? Catholic hospital. No tubal.

So, I talked to Daddy about a vascectomy, since it'd be cheaper, easier, and less invasive. No dice.

I've been on the pill in one form or another ever since. And I just keep gaining weight.

I'm very unhappy with my weight, and Daddy isn't exactly small either...so we're talking about and reviewing the various diet (lifestyle change) plans out there. Neither of us is comfortable talking about our weight issues with strangers, so something online or otherwise completely at home is what we're looking for. The plan is (and this is Daddy's idea; I think he's bonkers) to be "moderate" for the rest of the year, and start something serious January 1st.

And, um...somehow, my dear friend Anne isn't the only one discussing babies with her husband. But we both want to be at a healthy weight first (especially me, the last one was too hard with the extra pressure on my joints). But yeah, we're considering the possibility that, in a couple of years, we might talk about having another one.

So much for "Nope, I'm done."

Pictures

2006-11-17T15:29:00.000-06:00

Here's a picture of Boo at PE two weeks ago. It's his first time on roller skates (I couldn't believe his feet are big enough they had some that fit him!). Yes, I had to hold his hand the whole time, but he had a blast.

Here's one of The Princess and Boo before skating.

And here's the three of them this Halloween. They had a great haul. We intended to go to HallowZOOeen at the Tulsa Zoo, but it was far too cold. So, they trick-or-treated two of our neighbors and my parents and sister instead. Yep, four places, and they filled up their bags with all kinds of good stuff - mostly full size candy bars. Sugar rush!

Here's Her Royal Highness, Queen Kitty. She's not nearly as big as this picture makes her look. :)

And, last but certainly not least, here's a good one of Shorty taken last summer. I love this picture even though he needs a haircut in it. He's in our backyard, playing in the sandbox Boo got for his birthday. Those knees...so typical. He rubs the knees out of every single pair of pants he gets.

Age Tickers

2006-11-16T21:42:00.001-06:00

I found these cool tickers. What do you think? I like them.

Middle child syndrome

2006-11-16T15:40:00.000-06:00

The Princess is out running errands with Daddy today. She's been feeling a bit underappreciated and left out. We figured a bit of one-on-one time with Daddy might help, so off they went. They're mailing some stuff at the post office, getting the car an oil change, and picking up some milk.

The boys are outside digging in the sandbox. Boo's nose is still all snotty, and it's still a bit cool outside, but they really need the exercise and fresh air. So they're wearing sweatpants and jackets, and I'll fix them some of my dear friend's Extra Yummy Secret Recipe Hot Chocolate when they come in. :)

Heehee...Kitty is watching them throught the screen door, looking like she'd like to go swat some ankles. I'm so glad she came home. She got out one night when the door didn't get shut all the way and came open in the night, and she was missing for three days. Our friend said she was up by the barn, but we couldn't find her. Finally, Daddy was leaving for work one morning and saw her looking at him from under the porch. She's been a lot friendlier since she came home. I think she either got really hungry and realized how good she has it here, or something scared her while she was out there, because she hasn't even offered to go near the door when it's open since then.

Ya know, I didn't think I'd enjoy blogging so much. I never did keep a diary or journal for more than a week or so in the past, even when I was a kid and wanted to write novels when I grew up. (No, I don't want to do that anymore. I prefer reading them.) Maybe it's because I dislike handwriting so much. Typing certainly does make it easier (and faster).

Skipping School

2006-11-15T16:30:00.000-06:00

We were supposed to go to PE today, but we didn't. Boo has a snot nose AGAIN and it's frikking COLD and windy outside. Very Windy. And Very Cold.

They won't be having regular PE next week either, since it'll be Thanksgiving weekend. Guess we'll probably go see Dead Man's Chest on Friday and then I'll let Shorty and The Princess go swimming afterwards. Boo and I can go play in the gym. He likes chasing and kicking a soccer ball so much he'd do it for hours if I let him. And maybe I can get next week's lessons planned then, too.

Right now, they're watching the end of Hook (the movie with Robin Williams). After that, I'll probably insist they do their math, and we've GOT to dissect those flowers I bought today or they'll fall apart. Bible bedtime stories...yeah, that's plenty of school for today. I'm tired. Blech.

Insomnia Stinks!

2006-11-15T03:32:00.000-06:00

It's 3:30 am, and I'm still up. Daddy and I went to bed at about 11, and at 12:30 I finally gave up and went to take a bath, thinking that'd help me relax. Yeah.

It was working right up until Baby Boo woke up crying. Screaming. "Want milky, now!"

Okay, big problem. See, I've been trying my hardest to get rid of the sippy cups. The boy is two and a half years old. He can drink from a regular cup just fine. The sippies are just more convenient...

But he's been wanting one at night. And water just will not do. So yesterday, I finally got rid of all but one of them, thinking that if one wasn't available, people wouldn't be so tempted to just give in to the little tyrant. Not that I don't love him, I do, it's just that all toddlers are mini-tyrants. It's life. Get over it.

Okay, so we only have one cup. What does my husband do? Gives it to the boy with dinner. Like we're not sitting at the table. Like he hasn't been using a normal cup every night at dinner for weeks. Whatever.

So, his one sippy has orange juice in it. Sticky sweet orange juice, with pulp now caked in the valve. Shorty loads the dishwasher after dinner, and puts the sippy cup in it...but the dishwasher's not full. Nobody thinks much of this, since Boo shouldn't be getting one at night anyway, and Shorty always starts the dishwasher as soon as it's full.

Okay, so the sippy is in the dishwasher, waiting to be washed, and I'm in the bathtub when Boo wakes up screaming for "milky." What's my husband do? Jumps up out of bed to get the boy milk, of course!

Oh, wait. No cups in the cupboard. Cuss. Loudly. Open dishwasher. Dirty dishes. Cuss louder. Stomp off to Shorty's room. Wake him up. Yell at him about the dirty dishes.

Meanwhile, I'm out of the bathtub, pulling on my nightgown as I hurry into the kitchen.

Shorty is standing by the kitchen sink, crying, while Daddy yells about the one valve in the house being dirty, and how he wants Shorty to "scrub the kitchen" right this very minute! But go sit down first, 'cause now Daddy wants to go take a shower.

Picture me standing there, shaking with fury...

Daddy storms off to the shower; I hug Shorty and send him back to bed. I get Boo about 2 teaspoons of milk in a regular cup. I wash the sippy cup and valve myself and put them in the cupboard. Boo's happy and goes back to bed.

Daddy gets out of the shower. Comes in the living room, where I'm now sitting in the dark, fuming. "Where is he?" (Meaning Shorty.) "I sent him to bed. Leave him alone." "Damn it!" And off he goes to bed. He's snoring within 5 minutes...and I'm still out here, sitting in the dark, pouring out my troubles to a glowing screen.

Why can't he control his temper? He's promised to "try," whatever that means. It's really getting old.

Boy Scouts

2006-11-14T18:05:00.000-06:00

Shorty's getting ready for Webelos. He's so excited. Last year things didn't go very well. The cubmaster had a lot of personal issues and it really messed the whole thing up for everybody.

The den leader for this group is amazing. He always has something cool for the boys to do and leads them with a soft touch. He never yells or acts angry, though he is quick to tell the boys when they need to calm down or that he's disappointed in their behavior when they act up. They want so much to please him. It's wonderful.

Daddy will be taking him. He's actually taken him to the last couple of meetings too. I'm not sure what's up with that; he's usually not so involved. This is a good thing, though. He really needs to get to know his kids better, and this is a great way for that to happen.

Math is the only subject we actively studied today. The children have been helping me get caught up on laundry all day, and we went outside and fixed the skirting on the house and cleaned up the yard. It's supposed to storm tonight and we didn't want anything (including our house) to blow away. :)

Slackers

2006-11-13T22:06:00.000-06:00

Today, we didn't do much in the way of school. Shorty wrote another article for our newsletter (a brand new publication) and they both did their math and social studies. The Princess read Boo a couple of stories. They'll get a Bible story tonight (in about half an hour). They didn't do their spelling and vocabulary, though.

It was just such a pretty day I kicked them outside. They spent the morning and most of the afternoon pushing each other on the swings, digging in the sandbox, gathering firewood, looking at bugs, chasing balls, jumping rope, and running races. They tried to play "monkey in the middle" but it didn't work very well. Boo had a hard time catching and throwing the basketball they were using. Maybe some new playballs should find their way into Santa's bag for them.

2006-11-13T22:02:00.000-06:00

Blog post #1. No, I won't be numbering all my posts from now on. I just wanted it to be clear that this is my very first blog post here, ever. Ahem.

Now then, on to business. I'm a married mother of three. Shorty, our firstborn son, is almost 10. The Princess, our only daughter, is 8. Baby Boo will be three in May.

The children spend the majority of their days playing outside together, doing art projects, and helping me run our home. They usually cook breakfast and lunch together, wash dishes, fold laundry, take out the trash, sweep, mop, and vaccuum. Late afternoons are devoted to lessons, and any work left over is "homework" and must be done after dinner (or at least before the next day's lessons).

Yes, we're homeschoolers.

Yes, I'm nuts.

I took Shorty and Princess out of the local public school almost 2 years ago. We had lots of reasons for doing it...but the rewards have been so much greater than I would have thought that I'm not even considering sending Boo to school.

They still fight (as all siblings seem to) but...I dunno...it's different. They're not as hateful, not as mean somehow. Everything is much calmer. We don't have to keep to anyone's schedule if we don't want to. We can go on vacation anytime. The children don't spend half their lives waiting in lines, asking for permission to use the restroom, or doing busywork. Instead, they can LIVE their LIVES! It's amazing.

The argument I hear most often when people find out we're homeschoolers is "But what about socialization?!" Fooey, I say. We go to a homeschool PE class once a week, and the older two are involved in Boy and Girl Scouts. That's plenty of peer interaction, believe me. We also grocery shop, take walks, and take field trips together. They interact with all kinds of people, from zookeepers to cashiers, accountants to cattle farmers.

When was the last time you were isolated from everyone outside your peer group, save one older authority figure? School? Really? So that's an environment they'll almost never encounter outside the school setting? I'm shocked. Shocked, I say.

Just the other night Boo climbed up in bed with Daddy, who was reading a magazine. "Daddy. what. are. you. doing?" (He speaks very clearly with definite and complete pauses between words, which I find annoying but his father thinks is adorable.)
"Reading a magazine. Want to read it with me?" (Meaning "want to look at the pictures?")
"Yes. I. will. read. soon."
"You will?"
"Yes. I. will. learn. in. school."
"You will?"
"Yes. Mom. will. teach. me."

Muahhhaaahahaha!